You ever have an encounter that brings back memories or feelings that make you down right miserable? Most of the time, I do not because I’m great at letting it go. Oh, I get mad, and I’ll most likely let you know just how mad I am, but then I’m over it. And while I’ve blocked out much of my youth, when I do remember something, I always try to just let it go.
Do you believe that at some point in your life, perhaps when you are old or even dying, that you’ll have regret to the point that you’ll want to make it right or just simply show a more loving side? I’ll get back to this…….
November has been quite the test for me in my spiritual walk. Forgiveness is such a big part of our walk with the Lord and I can’t help to feel like it’s impossible for me right now. I was able to let go of so much and forgive so many when I gave in to God, but there is still some that lingers, apparently. Not too long ago, I saw people that I have tried to avoid over the years, all in one room. I was uncomfortable and completely overwhelmed with emotion. I left there crying, confused, and disappointed.
If you have ever blocked parts of your life out, then you probably also have a hard time remembering the good. At least I do anyways. I have focused for so many years on the bad, that I can’t remember the good and I know there was some. It may have came in small waves but it was there, and yet, I can’t remember any of it with this particular group of people. I left that house crying because I clearly had not dealt with my emotions that revolved around them. I left confused because I didn’t know what to say, how to act, or how to be after I left. I left disappointed in myself for not forgiving the past and shunning the little positives that were happening at the moment. And let me tell you, it can be very difficult to see positives, and even harder to embrace them.
I do believe a person can have regret later in their life and want to make things right in one way or another. I believe that a person who said the ugliest things to hurt you, can turn around only to say how much they love you, and pray that you forgive who they once were. Even they, deserve prayer.
I have learned that their wrongs can be made right with God. It’s not my place to hold judgement against them for their sins, as I am a sinner as well. But it is my place to let it go and forgive, even when forgiving feels impossible. What example would I be if I knowingly saw them trying, and did nothing……
Be merciful, even as your Father is merciful. (37) “Judge not, and you will not be judged; condemn not, and you will not be condemned; forgive, and you will be forgiven;” Luke 6:36-37 ESV