Comments on: Where is a Woman’s Place?

By: Amber

Amber — Mon, 20 Apr 2009 19:22:09 +0000

There is no “place” for a woman. That’s what feminism has been fighting for all these years. If you are lucky enough to have the choice (which most families don’t), as a woman, we can now choose whether to have a fulfilling career or stay at home with our children. Be happy if you have that decision to make, why make someone feel bad that they chose differently?

Women are all different. We can’t be stereotyped. That’s also what feminism has fought against. You can’t say that all women would prefer to be at home with their children. All women are not fulfilled in the same way. The same choice cannot be right for every woman when we are so vastly different.

Why can’t people just live their lives, make their own decisions and stop being so judgemental of everyone else?

And why don’t men get the same kind of razzing for working, leaving their children without the love and learning that a stay at home dad could bring to the equation?

By: tanyetta

tanyetta — Fri, 08 Aug 2008 05:35:54 +0000

I am a stay at home mommy. I’ve been home full time for the past four years and plan to stay home until my son leaves for kindy. Who knows, I might wake up tomorrow and decide staying home just isn’t working for the family anymore.

I’ll keep you posted. ;)

Oh…I posted this on the other site and wanted to share this on yours:

You know I got love for you so, it’s NOTHING personal towards you–

I think we all can learn and live by this too ;)

In order not to offend anyone, just state what YOU’RE doing and what’s working for YOUR family.

Judgements come in when we say things like, “we don’t see how such and such can do such and such.”

We all do what we have to do and what we feel are in the best interest of our families.

Let’s ALWAYS keep in mind, What works for ONE family might NOT work for another. There are NO right or wrong ways. Whatever way YOU choose to take care of YOUR family is what matters. Let’s ALWAYS keep that in mind.

Ding!

You’re now free to move about the country!

By: tanyetta

tanyetta — Fri, 08 Aug 2008 05:23:53 +0000

Please email me. Thanks.

By: Laurie

Laurie — Tue, 05 Aug 2008 22:20:15 +0000

I think it is sad that you judge people who must or choose (YES CHOOSE) to work after having children. I scaled back working recently after learning that I am being blessed with a second child. I will continue to work part time after my child is born. I worked hard to become a professional in my field, and don’t want to give that up. Plus I still owe student loans that continue to need to be repaid. I did notice that you married very young, maybe that changed your perspective on things. I personally would not judge you for staying home, but you judge me for working. How sad.

By: Lori

Lori — Tue, 05 Aug 2008 19:11:13 +0000

Obviously you lack maturity…so sad.

By: Malek'sMom

Malek'sMom — Tue, 05 Aug 2008 18:55:14 +0000

this is alot of bs…which cave do you live in? it’s unbelievable that for every step fwd that we women take – the likes of you make us take 10 back!! how much does your husband make?? you must be in the rich percentile…the rest of us need to have both parents work in order for our children to do what yours are able to do/have. and what’s with this “making love to your husband and making him feel like a manâ€¦that is also part of a wifeâ€™s job.” nonsense?? that’s insane! so what we have to lie there and let him do what he wants, cuz it’s our “job”?? like sweeping and doing the laundry? wow, that’s exciting.
i’m glad i have an open-minded husband who loves both me & our son so very much that he is willing to work from home so that i am able to work a job (not the kind described above) that provides us with a good income & benefits. put that in your blueberry pancakes.
and just so we’re clear: i would never be a stay-at-home mom. even if i were rich, i would work even if only part-time, and have a nanny for when i was not home. i was born with a brain, something i intend to use for things other than making cookies & changing diapers.
also: my mother was a stay-at-home mom. she loved it. those who stay at home & love it, should keep doing so. those who work, should keep working. feminism is all about choices. WE choose what to do – not society, and certainly not some man who thinks its our “job” to do anything…
peace.

By: Coco

Coco — Tue, 05 Aug 2008 18:48:34 +0000

I agree with majority of what you wrote. I am currently transitioning from staying at home to working part time. I think one thing alot of women leave out on the topic is how lonely it gets to be a SAHM. I dreamnt it would be great. Just me and my boys. My mom never got to stay with us so i thought surely that’s why i’m the way i am. Turns out, I strongly disliked. Not just the early mornings or the late nights. But the whining, the lack of family support, the stress of finances, (even when you cut out alot of luxuries) and the lack of friends or moms like you. I have gone out and joined many clubs for moms but it all seemed fake and sometimes judgemental. I have found myself to be a better mom andperson when i started working. Of course i’m tired but i’m not overwhelmed by having kids all day long and no outlet. My marriage hasn’t suffered. I still talk to my husband and spend time with him. I think if you can stay at home then do it. But don’t beat yourself up if you feel like you absolutely need to stay at home for the rest of your childbearing years to be a woman or a good mom. I am slowly learning that. Or maybe i wasn’t cut out to be a SAHM or a mom even. at any rate, i have two little precious boys to raise up and see that they are protected and loved.

By: Why My Marriage Works : All Chick Stuff

Why My Marriage Works : All Chick Stuff — Tue, 22 Jan 2008 05:36:09 +0000

[...] like letting him wear the pants and be the man (or think it;) and me being the woman.Â I think my job as a wife to take care of the house, stay home and raise the children, and make sure my family has what they [...]

By: Increasing RSS Feed Subscribers | Blogging with Cents

Increasing RSS Feed Subscribers | Blogging with Cents — Thu, 13 Dec 2007 04:32:21 +0000

[...] one, it DOES work.Â On my personal blog, “A Cowboy’s Wife”, I wrote about where a woman’s placeÂ is.Â Woohoo! Now that created a bit of noise, in fact, I had to do a follow up on it.Â But what [...]

By: Anonymous

Anonymous — Fri, 24 Aug 2007 16:11:00 +0000

I get so sick of women who stay at home trying to justify their existence by touring that the world would be a better place if all women followed in their footsteps. What a bunch of garbage. Let me paint a picture of them good ol' days when women actually did stay at home. I'll even give you a true story about my own grandmother.

She was a pastors daughter and married my grandfather whom she met in college. My great grandfather only paid for her to go to college for one year because he felt it was a significant enough amount of time for her to land a husband - and she did. My grandfather cheated on her from the onset of their marriage and she had no escape from it as she had 4 children and no job skills other than those a maid would have. She was miserable the rest of her life until she died. My great aunt was in a similar situation. She wanted to be a Pediatrician - loved children - but my uncle didn't want her any place but under his control. It was a relief to her when he died after 20 or so years of marriage.

I am a mother of 2 fantastic kids. I work fulltime and make a great living and so does my husband. In fact, I don't have to work. But I do because I enjoy the financial freedom, the work itself, making worthwhile contributions to society and for the security knowing that if god forbid something ever happened to my husband, I wouldn't be whoring myself trying to scratch out a living to support my children.

I find it amusing that people (men especially) are trying to push so hard the "beauty" of motherhood and that rah rah rah and how important it is to stay at home with kids. Well, if it's so very honorable and important, they can get off their butt and stay home with their own kids and give up their careers, hopes, dreams, ambitions and otherwise lives. They can trade it all in for raising children.

I somehow think it's better for BOTH parents to be equal custodians of the children they created together and demonstrate how important it is to be able to take care on oneself by both parents holding down jobs. And no, my kids aren't in daycare (which there is nothing wrong with). I work days and my husband works nights so we both participate in the raising of our children.

Men get an automatic station of priveledge in life. They get to make a way for themselves, realize their hopes and dreams, have a wife and kids with minimal personal and career sacrifice. Women get the drudgery. I for one will not sit by quietly and accept my "position" in life. I made something of myself. And my children are going to be better for it.

Lilith