You can read my previous posts here.
So today, I facebooked this:
Question: Do you think church can teach a beginner anything? Someone who really hasn’t ever gone? If so, how and if not, where can one go to learn more?
The first reply was from Marcia
GO. You will either hear what you are searching for or you won’t BUT a little more water will be added to the soil because somewhere along the way, SOMEONE planted a seed in you that you WANT to nourish.
Well, apparently there’s a drought happening here because I’m still not “getting it.” Honestly, I just don’t know what to do. Maybe I’m just not meant to ‘get it’, reckon? Although, I do feel like something is missing spiritually. I know that I want to believe and that I should believe. I also know that I still feel very uncomfortable when praying. VERY uncomfortable and well, I don’t know why. I wish I did though. Just when I feel like I’m making a small bit of progress, I regress.
I thought about attending church but 1) I have never really liked a traditional church…*yawn* and 2) I wouldn’t understand any of it because even after trying to learn about the bible and read it, I still don’t understand any of it. I feel like I’m a lost cause in a way. Even though I have this need & want, I can’t seem to make myself believe, completely. Someone mentioned bible studies or joining up with the womens worship night thingamajig but would that help at all?
I’ve been observing some interesting things for the past couple of months, like acceptance. While I know some people that are kind and say hey, etc, there are others who still don’t embrace another and even cast ‘looks’. These women are Christians. So I noticed that the most judgmental people I have seen lately, are church goers and believers. And keep in mind, I am an observer. I watch everyone. I hear a lot. I see a lot.
So here is my current theory. I’ve never really been judgmental. Yeah, sure I’ve perhaps said a thing or two about someone that I don’t care for but I’m pretty accepting to all those around me for who they are, what they believe, and how they live, even when others don’t like them. So I’m thinking that if I start to believe as much as some of these women (or people), then maybe I’ll start to judge others in a more critical way because they don’t go to church “live right” or whatever. And that’s so not me. I know what you’re saying..”that’s so stupid” and I agree I reckon. Maybe I’m just trying to find a reason why I’m so stupid when it comes to this and will find any reason to grasp on to.
The fact is, everyone is a little judgmental at times…I guess I hold the believers up to a higher standard because they are not supposed to judge AT ALL….which is why I’m picking on them but honestly, it’s not them, it’s all me. My weird belief system, that will continue to hold me back..until I die?
And that’s where I’m at today. So you tell me…am I ever gonna get it? Or should I let it go and just deal with what I am today?
Have you heard stories of infertility where once they stop trying they get pregnant?
Maybe you are trying too hard. Or maybe you are looking in the wrong place. If the bible isn’t satisfying your quench try the torah or the koran.
Personally I am Agnostic. I believe in god but can not follow a particular religion. It is my belief that you don’t have to have a specific building to worship in or a leader such as a pope or rabbi or mullah to tell you what you are allowed to believe and accept.
Believe in YOU. The rest will fall into place.
Don’t feel bad i’m the same way i know so many people that all during the week act a fool and do things that church goers are not supposed to do such as cheat on their spouse, curse, do drugs, and drink to get drunk yet they go to church on sunday like they are saints. Then i also know people who are such advid church goers that they take from their familys food or bill money to give to the church they let their bills fall behind, cars break down and don’t get them fixed let their wives and children go with out so they can give their 15% of their weekly pay to the church. I DON”T GET IT EITHER! I like you believe but i just can’t bring my self to sit and read the bible, or go to a place where every one is judgemental of everyone else only while they are in church they do no wrong but as soon as they step outta gods house they turn back in to the person they were before they stepped in i used to go to church with a friend and began to like it , not long after i had been going some of our friends that went were having problems in their marriage( the husband had been with another woman that also went to the church and gotten her pregnant even thou the wife had forgiven him and they were working on things ) the church pretty much shuned them but the unmarried pregnant girl was allowed to stay because her grandmother was one of the founding church members . after that i stopped going ive been back to differnt churches at times in my life after my father died and a few others but i have no need to go and rub shoulders with people to believe that their is a god and thats that, there may be a time in the future i may return to a church but at this time i’m fine with believing and thats enough for me.
I attend church and love it! Are there judgemental people? Yes, maybe a couple. Do they control whether I attend or not? No. Church is a family, a group of people that come together to honor, worship and serve God. Church is like all families, so you will have conflict at times but should not happen often. You press through, pray about the situation and never take your eyes off what is the main goal. Why go? I read this: Hebrews 10:25: Not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together, as the manner of some is; but exhorting one another: and so much the more, as ye see the day approaching. First, I love going and watching His people come together in unity worshipping Him. This scripture tells me to NOT forsake going to assembly together with other believers, to exhort one another. There is a bigger picture than just dressing up and making an appearance. There are opportunities that are there to lift someone up, serve in a capacity to teach little ones about His love, to help build a Kingdom that one day will be our home. We have other opportunities to serve such as a soup kitchen and food pantry. Its more about others than it is “serve me”.
The following scripture is one of my favorites. When things look rough, I know His promise:
Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.
I have seen hard times and it is His promises that carry me…Isaiah 43:2 “When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze” (NIV).
He loves me and I trust Him..John 3:16 For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.
You just read 3 scriptures that I love, and that is just 3 of so many promises that He gave us. I believe His word as the truth and my guide. He will never mislead me or lie, He is a promise keeper.
So what do you do with the judgemental people that you run into? Look at them like Jesus looks at them…with love. You may not be able to get close to some of them, but let God deal with them and you carry on. There are not as many as you think. Personalities get in the way and therefore its hard unless you take the first step.
I pray that you find the answers you are looking for.
Sincerely, Nancy
I’m not fond of organized religion. I attended a few churches growing up and the whole group aspect made me very uncomfortable. Maybe it’s because of my loner nature or perhaps it’s religion in general, I don’t know. But I understand how you feel.
I think the most difficult aspect of all of it is Faith. It goes against everything I’ve been taught, my very nature and to fully immerse myself into something that is based on a book, written by people, who naturally have a tendency to lie and embellish … I find that extremely difficult. I just haven’t found it in me to take that leap.
Maybe you will, maybe you won’t …. but I think we’re all born with that little voice of right/wrong and if you live your life embracing THAT … maybe that’s all the religion you need.
Lori,
I have been in church since I was very little. I started out as Catholic and now consider myself non-denominational Christian. And I completely agree with you when you say that Christians are the most judgemental people out there. I found that in the South, Texas esp that churches are hard to find one where you feel comfortable. The Bible Belt as it is called if very Southern Baptist rooted and they are very particular it’s hard to feel accepted.
Then you have the mega churches and finding your way around one of those is next to impossible.
I think, a small women’s group would help you if you want certain questions answered or are looking for deeper relationships with other women. When you are looking for a church check out their websites and get a feel of what they have to offer. If they are using the King James Version of the bible then it’s going to be really hard to understand what’s going on. Look for churches that use the NIV.
Do you have any friends that go to church that you could ask your basic questions?
I feel you on your church struggle. I am Christian, but I do not attend church (I have many reasons) & I follow the Messianic Jewish beliefs (http://rabbiscott.com/WhatWeBelieve.html – this conflicts with “regular Christianity” too – I struggle with this as well).
I would rather attend a Bible Study. Try starting small and work your way from there. Also, it’s not about church. It’s about your relationship with God & faith. And sometimes, Christianity isn’t for everybody (not saying that you aren’t a Christian). Just my view. Best wishes with your walk with God or any belief that you choose.
Sorry about my rambling…
I grew up going to Catholic church every week {my parents go to church every day now} I was turned off by the ‘traditional’ church and have just recently began attending a Christian church. I have to say, it’s SO VERY different than a traditional church. I love it. I take what I need from attending. I don’t go to bible studies, just to church on Sundays and I love the way it gives me a positive outlook on life for the week. I’m a positive person naturally but I feel going to this church just gives that extra inspiration I was so looking for. My advice, try out a few different churches and find the one that fits you:)
Just because you go to church and claim to be a Christian, does mean you are mature in your faith.
Every Christian is at their own walk and level of understanding what God via the Bible is instructing us to do in our walk with him. His desires for you may not be exactly what he wants for another of his children. If it were the same for all of us, I guess all of us would be preachers.
I agree about many Christian’s or even pastors becoming very judgemental, and of course that is not our place. We are to love everyone and treat them with kindness. Now that doesn’t mean we have to agree with them, or let them undermine or change our faith viewpoint or change our churches to meet their criteria. That is why there are different denominations within the Christian faith, as well as different types of churches even within some denominations.
Most Christians believe God starts hearing your prayers once you have accepted Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior. Then the Holy Spirit comes to live in your heart.
I know my prayers don’t fall on deaf ears. I’ve even had a couple small miracles in my life from God, and I know it is him who has protected my family from being harmed by some awful people, as well as protecting us from being in some fatal type vehicle accidents.
Maybe if you don’t want to go to a local church, just watch some church programs on TV. Some I enjoy are Charles Stanley and Perry Stone. There are many, many good ones on TV.
If something confuses you in the Old Testament maybe you can search a Jewish Rabbi site on the internet and ask them some questions. Sometimes they give you more insight and understanding into something than a lot of Christian preachers can.
Example I never understood why God liked Abel’s offering and not Cain’s. I wasn’t getting a lot of help from my Christian pastor, so I asked a rabbi online. He helped me understand. I also did not understand why Cain was not put to death for killing his brother, since further in the Bible God talked about an eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth type of punishment. It was a rabbi that helped clarify that for me too.
Once you are saved, accepted Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior, then you can pray right before you read the Bible that he give you understanding of a certain number of verses you are reading. If you don’t understand after you’ve read them, pray again. Come back to those verses later on.
Most preachers even will tell you that each time they read the Bible they learn something new, no matter how long they’ve been preaching.
So, I don’t think the Bible is meant to be learned or understood totally the first time it’s read through.
It’s a lifelong process of growing and knowing.
Some Christian’s never really want to mature in their faith, so they don’t put the work in. These are the ones that will be acting like the devil during the week and going to Church on Sunday trying to make others think they are something they really are not. However, they don’t fool God.
Personally, I’m taking a break from going to a local church right now. I just need to be away from some
fellow Christian’s that are gossips and judge others. That does not mean I’m taking a break from God though. I still pray and worship in my own way, I also watch good Christian programs on TV, like the Jewish Rabbi, who is a messianic Jew. Messianic Jews believe Jesus Christ was the Messiah.
There is nothing stupid about knowing little about the Bible and not understanding.
There is nothing stupid when a newborn baby doesn’t know how to hold a spoon and feed itself.
There is nothing stupid about a 1 year old that can’t read a Dictionary.
There is nothing stupid about a 2 year that can’t prepare, and cook a gourmet meal all by themselves.
A beginner is a beginner in anything and the steps to learning are different for each and everyone of us in anything.
I know I still struggle with my mind not jumping around to other things or wandering when I silently pray, so it’s better for my prayers to be said out loud, so I can stop the wandering mind. My mind wanders when I read the Bible silently to learn too, so it’s better for me to read outloud and jot down notes and even questions to ask God in prayer.
There is one passage in the Bible though, that I know is true. It is No One Comes To The Father Except Through The Son. So basically it means if you want a relationship with God The Father, you must first accept Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior and Believe he died on the cross on your sins.
I hope you don’t give up, especially if you feel there is something missing.
Sorry, I meant to say above that he died on the cross for your sins, not on your sins. Silly, brain glitch.
I also wanted to say if you do decide to start attending a church that you would be ahead of the game so to speak, because you already know you don’t want to judge others. Since that is something God told us he wanted of us (Judge not least ye be judged), then you would be able to help Christians that are having a problem in that area.
You could say something like, Janice (just a made up name for this example), I heard what you just said to me and all I know to say in response to that is what God put in his Bible, and it was Judge not least ye be judged.
Though, believe me trying to stop someone who is not mature in their faith from judging other people is very hard. I tried it more than a few times and it was like it fell on deaf ears.
Also, when I say mature in relationship to a Christian, it has nothing to do with age, or even how long someone has been one. It has to do with how much work they’ve put in trying to learn how God wanted them to treat others and live according to his words and purpose for their life.
Holding sinners and yes Christians are still sinners each and everyday, to different judgemental standards is harder now isn’t it, just a little? I mean seeing that we all don’t mature or some don’t even really want to mature (because they don’t really want to give up some of the things that maybe God would really like them to give up doing in their lives) at the same rate.
It’s kind of like comparing a Porsche’s speed to another Porsche’s speed, it’s more like comparing a Porsche’s speed, to a old model T, a 49 Ford, a 64 Buick, a Jeep, a Mustang, etc., etc., etc……
We’re just not all up to the same speed on what God wants of us, and if we were wouldn’t that be pretty boring to God, and no challenge to him either. I think his challenge to us his created beings is trying to reach our hearts and then trying to get through to us to help us grow into the best spiritual beings we are, because we have more than just an earthly body which we inhabit, we have souls too.
I know you have a very kind soul, or you wouldn’t examine these things so much in your life.
Lori
First off whoever said that we MUST worship inside a church? Personally I believe the world is our church and if you walk around treating others in a kind,accepting way then I’d say you are practicing a whole lot of faith.
Maybe you aren’t “getting it” because you’ve already got it and are in fact living it ?
Btw it was nice to finally meet you at CES, lol wish we’d had more time to connect! maybe at blogher?
There are sooooo many different kinds of churches. Sounds to me like you’d want to find a non-traditional one, one that is what they call “seeker-friendly”. Cuz that’s what you are, a seeker. Those kinds of churches try to keep things pretty basic, for beginners. I say go and check it out. Try not to let the judgemental people and their looks bother you, nobody is perfect and they aren’t either. Prayer is like anything, uncomfortable when you first try it. It takes practice, so my advice is to just try it. Doesn’t have to be fancy, just talk as if there is someone there to help you, because He is. Ask questions, ask for help, ask for clarity and faith. Even believers have doubts, St. Francis famously said “Lord I believe, help me in my unbelief.” I think you’re on the right track and should keep at it. The Bible is not a book you can just pick up and read and get it. Maybe try a book like Lee Stroebel’s “The Case for Christianity”. He was a journalist and an unbeliever and decided to research why so many people believe the Christian Bible, and what he found turned him into a believer too. He went at it very scientifically. Anyway, know that at least I will be praying for you.
There is such a thing as being religious which is what many people are- but to be a real Christian means you have surrendered your life and will to Jesus Christ as YOUR Lord and Savior trusting Him alone to forgive your sins- because you are (as all of us are) a sinner. A religious person will pay for their sins in hell (after death). A person who has a relationship with Jesus Christ will spend eternity in heaven because they have received the gift of eternal life through trusting Christ’s death on the cross AS the payment for their sins. God requires justice. He can’t live with sin. Thats why He had to send His Son to die for our sins. None of us are good enough to get to heaven on our own. I encourage you take the Good Test and it will explain from the bible why we NEED a Savior and how we can come to know Him. Please check it out! http://www.thegoodtest.net Prayin’ for you, girl ;)
I wanted to add something here for you Lori. The seed was planted and you are curious, which is good. The link I sent you today has a bit of a story to go with it…Cassandra and I have not seen one another in over 6 years. We weren’t even friends on FB until yesterday (coincidence?). God is always at work..even when we don’t think He is… I was looking at another friends FB page the other night, checking out who I knew who was a friend of theirs, type thing…I saw Cassie’s name and thought she probably doesn’t even remember me so I didn’t friend her. The very next day she friended me, out of the blue …the she wrote her post last night and it spoke to me. While reading it, I thought that you could use it..that it sounded so much like you..so I sent it to you. I know it will raise questions, and it will make you think…God is working in your heart already, even when you don’t realize it. He knows exactly what He is doing and HIS timing is the only timing. So, there you have it…you are a strong, loving, amazing and caring woman. You, like Cassie, have a huge impact on others..people read your blog because you’re real and honest. That was her first blog post, but I’m sure not her last. Hang in there girl…people are praying for you. Don’t give up on God, don’t worry that you haven’t got it yet…He has definitely NOT given up on you. D.
(A long one, sorry about that!)
Maybe it’s not a traditional church that is calling to your soul. Maybe it’s not even a “christian” God that will fill that void. God, if you choose to call him/her/it God, is everywhere. I grew up learning about various “religions” My mother was raised Christian, my father Jewish. Technically, I was considered Jewish, as mother had converted before marriage and than when back after they divorced. But, a month every summer found me in No. California with my Baba (russian for grandma, my mothers mother) and foster grandparents, thus thrusting me into a methodist church and never was I comfortable. Nor was I comfortable sitting at a temple of Friday nights. I can tell you a little of what the bible says and I can recite and translate Yiddish prayers. We celebrate both Christmas and we light candles on Channuka. My father had huge Christmas’s even though he and his wife did Channuka as well. Never had a Christmas tree there, as it was called a Channuka Bush, flecked in white every year (fortunately they’ve since stopped the flocking and now have a green tree!) I married at 19, a man who came from a very ruthless Baptist family and was judged for many years by his mother, even after our divorce, till they day his parents passed. My mother has since found a church that is not methodist, honestly can’t tell you what it is. My half brother and her at times, judge me because I do not claim a Christian religion and for some reason believe I do not have a concept of “God”. My littlest sister (also half) spent a year in China, preaching the bible, something that is illegal, yet she does not judge me. Ironically, my Baba ended up being more “new age” when she passed, allowing me actually to receive her Buddha’s and other items in that area. I entered AA at the age of 22, (I am now 46) and after so many years of not understanding and feeling less than the others, found a “higher power” that at THAT time worked for me. My oldest son, 26 is a die hard atheist (imagine his baptist grandmothers reactions to that!) and is currently raising my granddaughter with his atheist wife in an atheist home, however, as I have done with him and his younger brother and sister, he tries to show her all the ways to find that peace within yourself so that when she grows up, she can make her choices of what is right for her. My daughter (20) and other son (15) have no strong ties to any organized religion, but are well aware of as many as I could show them, including the Mormon and The Jehova (spelling) Witness’s religion. For me, it is much different.
While I don’t choose to call that higher power God most times, I do believe there is something far greater than myself and others, working in our lives. It could be ANYTHING. I have much difficulty sitting in a traditional church. I actually have the same problem that you seem to have. Christians, especially in my experience, women, are very judgmental. If I don’t do it their way or if I don’t find “God” as they know “God” they are very critical of me. From my understanding of the bible, “God” is the only one to judge. I believe there is actually a passage that says, do not judge, less you be judged or something of that sort. And another that says something close to God is the only judge. (I’m not a huge quoter or reader of the bible so I’m sure that’s not the actual quote).
You mentioned “spiritual crisis”, not “religion crisis” VERY different “crisis'” IMHO. Faith, in something that one feels is not tangible is a huge leap, not one you can take lightly. Being spiritual, for me, is far different than being religious. I am not religious. I do not like to attend orthodox or traditional temples or churchs. While my views may change as I spiritually grow, they still have a core to them as I mentioned above. There is something greater than myself, working in my life. I read many books, mostly on eastern philosophy and “new age” – buddha’s and the like. I have in my home various items of my upbringing that I can stomach and my different Buddha’s. Do I believe in Buddha? Yes. Do I believe Buddha is “God” not like some believe in “God”. And what about being a chosen person, being Jewish, do I believe Jesus existed? Yes in my odd sort of way, I do. If I believe that there were/are Buddha’s than my mind tells me I must also believe that Jesus existed, I simply do not follow his teachings, like others do.
In the beginning of this, I mentioned a spiritual crisis and a religion crisis. May I suggest you look into the spiritual aspect of all this, rather than the religious aspect. Updated Western beliefs will be dotted throughout with Eastern beliefs. In AA, they told me when I entered with the inability to believe in anything, including myself, to “act as if” and eventually I would find what was right for me. Very difficult, but I was so emotionally sick, physically sick and spiritually sick, I didn’t care if it was difficult or not. I had a void that desperately needed to be filled and alcohol and drugs no longer filled that void. For a long time, the people in AA filled it until I found what worked for me, acting as if. Have you heard that old saying, about a man who was stranded (it varies, depending on who repeats it and I’ve probably got it all wrong!) in a lake or some odd place and prayed to God to send help. Along came an eskimo, helicopter and boat, all of which the man refused help from. The man died and stood in front of God and said, why did you not help me? God told him, I sent you an eskimo, boat and helicopter and you refused help. So, it comes in many different ways and forms, “God’s” help. Try not to snub your nose at anything that comes to you in forms of teaching, religion or spiritual. You will know if it is right for you, almost immediately. A soothing of the soul comes, a peace within you, a weight lifted off your shoulders, some feeling will say to you – hey, let me look further into this, that something, for me is our intuition, for others it could be “God”.
And on the subject of praying? I was told that if I hit my knees every night, it would make me humble and I would be able to pray to God. I tried it. I really made an effort. Remember, act as if? It simply never worked for me, after years of doing it I felt I had given it my best effort, my best shot and I had to look at it differently. Did I want to be humble? Oh yes, more than anything I wanted to be humble and I wanted others to see that I was humble (though this is not a good idea, sets you up for many failures) One cannot see humility in another, unless one is also humble. When I read that, I realized that I had at least some humility inside of me, since I could see it in others. Still, praying did not seem to be what was right for me. Instead, I send out positive thoughts. I put it out to the Universe, out loud or more often than not, in writing. I have a shoebox, with a slit on the top (some call it a God box, it’s just a shoebox for me with a slit on top of it lol) and when I want to send out positive thoughts for others, I write them down (if I do not say them out loud) and place them in there. I also write about changes I would like to see in myself and place them in there. Each year I go through them, see if there’s been any growth in me, if changes came where I asked them to come, in my life and others. Then file them away for the year. It’s actually very simple. When others ask for prayers, I tell them positive thoughts and love being sent your way. And sometimes, I will place on my facebook page, “If you are so inclined to, please send prayers or positive thoughts to so and so for so and so” and some tell me they are praying, others tell me positive thoughts being sent. It’s all good, whatever works for them is good for me. As long as it’s being put out there for whatever it is that is bigger than us, in a positive way, I don’t care if it’s prayers or thoughts, it all works.
I apologize for the length of this. It’s not an easy subject for anyone to talk about and as you are finding, many will be judgmental and critical of you, whatever path you choose to go down. My belief is that they are fearful. That I might find a way that provides me peace and comfortability in something that is different from where they find it, thus maybe having them to have to look at what is working for them and perhaps change how they believe. But, I don’t follow that line of thinking in my world. If it’s working for you and as long as you don’t put me down for what is working for me, it’s all good. Do I keep my mind open to the ways of others and listen to them? You bet, as best I can. Do I wish others would afford me the same kindness? Sure, but they don’t have to. I need to be true to myself. I do find myself at times asking why they are so critical of me and is that what their “God” has taught them, if it gets overwhelming, that usually shuts those types up, if only for a moment. Do I judge? Sure I do. Of others? Yes at times, but that’s not what my teachings have taught me so I do try not to – humanity gets in the way and so yes, I do judge at times, sometimes more than I wish I did. When I catch myself doing it, I try to make it a positive. Doesn’t always work, but again, I’m only human and unlearning bad habits is not an easy task.
Keep your mind open. Your eskimo or helicopter or boat may have already come, but that doesn’t mean it can’t come again. Look into a spiritual path, as opposed to a religious path. Have you heard of Pascal’s wager? He gives us this, “I would rather believe in God, die and find out there is no God, than to not believe and die and find out there is a God.” So, that is what I basically, in the most simply of thoughts follow. I would rather believe there is something greater than myself working in my life, die and find out there isn’t, than to not believe, die and find out there is. Be it God, Buddha or a freaking doorknob (doorknobs are tangible, so it’s not an impossible idea to believe that it is a power greater than oneself, since you can physically touch it, something else AA taught me, in a way to get me to slower enter into the thought of a higher power that isn’t tangible and for me it worked.)
So, I shall close this. It is far longer than I had wanted to send, but I do hope that it helps you in some way. Or you may think, ugh, look at the type of readers I am attracting, that’s fine too. Which ever path you choose, is the one you are supposed to be on, just like at the moment, you are on a path you are supposed to be on. This is how we learn, grow and inspire others.
Good luck to you. May you find a peace within.
Peace.
Lea
Lori,
You are certainly not a lost cause! Will you ever get it? YES! WHY? Because you are a fighter and you don’t give up.Your continued posts about searching for the truth shows that. It shows that even though you don’t understand, you are not giving up on him and he won’t give up on you either. Remember Christians are human too. Some people forget that they/we are still sinners too and our flesh can sometimes get us in trouble to. More so because the devil can’t stand that we have a relationship with God.So he works overtime with us.
I think the best thing to always keep in the back of your mind is it’s not all about religion, it’s about the personal relationship you have between you and God. I think your post will stir the pot but in a good way. It will remind us all (especially Christian’s) that eyes are always watching us and that we need to be reminded that our testimony as a child of God is at stake.
We had had a rough past year and we have gone through so many struggles with my husbands illness, losing our house to a flood,having our mom move in with us, loss of family members and more. Without God I don’t think I could have ever made it through. He took care of us every step of the way. I think he allowed some things to happen to even test my faith and teach me to lean on him and trust him more.
John 3:16 For God so loved the world that he gave his only begotten son, that whosoever believeth in him, should not parish but have ever lasting life.
I feel so bad. I don’t know what words I can say to help you in your struggles and your journey.So I am just going to keep praying for you like I have been for the past several months. I don’t have a lot of time to read blogs because I work full time and I hope you will give me a little nudge when you have more posts like this. My heart breaks when I read them but I want to be kept up to date on how you are feeling because I care about you.
Lori if you have a Bible a few versus I would suggest are:
Romans 3:23 , Romans 6:23,Romans 5:8,Romans 10:13,Romans 10: 9-10, and Revelations 3:20
http://my-erbc.com/
Sadly, we live in a fallen world and not one of us is perfect, even Christians. I’m so glad you are still seeking God. Keep seeking. Just remember that He offers love and grace. It amazes me to know that no matter HOW many times I mess up, my heavenly father still loves me no matter what. It’s a love that surpasses even what we xeperience with our own children, and you know how much you love your own children!
I attend church, and like you, it disappoints me what I see there sometimes. I’m also disappointed in my own self when I have judgemental thoughts. I often wonder how God can love me when I am clearly so imperfect, but that’s just how wonderful He is.
I read a few short devotionals everyday….Our Daily Bread, Journey (from Lifeway), and Open Windows. Then I read the scriptures and pray. These short devotions are so on target with the world we live in and so easy to grasp. They often explain so many things I have questions about.
Keep seeking, Lori. All the Lord wants is for you to believe in Him. That’s it. His love and grace are not dependent on anything…it is unconditional. There is nothing you can do to eanr it. It was already bought with the blood of Jesus.
https://secure.rbc.org/odb/signup/
http://www.lifeway.com/article/?id=169846&CID=RDR-Journey
http://www.lifeway.com/lwc/mainpage/0,1701,M%253D201025,00.html
I would be glad to send you a copy of these to see if you like them.
Lori….I’m a Christian and I do believe there’s a huge difference between Christianity and organized religion. Church pews and some pulpits are full of people who know the right things to say and think they’re following God but what they’re actually doing is following church doctrine and man made rules, regulations and teachings. Those are the people that judge those that don’t believe the way they do or don’t dress the way they think you’re suppose to dress when going to church. The people who look down their noses on people who smoke, have an occasional drink or listen to contemporary music. Those are NOT true followers of Christ.
The bible is a love story, the greatest love story every written. It’s all about how much God loves us and that includes all of us. When Jesus came he didn’t seek out those that had a certain amount of money or those that looked a certain way, He came for ALL and he walked among those that most churches today look down upon.
I’ve been to many churches and don’t go because of what they call themselves but more for what they teach.
I started out like you, looking for “something” but not sure where to find it. I was put in touch with an ex-coworker who went to a bible study at her father’s house and from the moment I heard then talk I knew I’d found “IT”. It took me almost a year to make the decision to go to church and it took several churches to find the one that felt like home.
As far as praying goes, I don’t know how. I won’t pray out loud in front of people because I’m afraid I’m not saying the “right” words. My prayers aren’t as eloquent as I think they should be. What I do is talk. I have conversations with God. I may start out just asking a question and my questions do get answered. Sometimes by a voice inside my head or a thought or a feeling and sometimes there’s silence but I can tell you once you experience an answer from God you want more.
God doesn’t care who you are, what you look like or how you dress. He doesn’t care what you say as He knows what’s in your heart and when you talk to Him you’re opening your heart to Him. Don’t be afraid to tell Him your doubts and ask Him to show you where you need to be. He will show you, it might be as bold as a bolt of lightening hitting you or it could be as subtle as the next person you meet but He does her and will answer you, in His time.
As I said I’ve been where you are and even though I don’t have all the answers I’m a good listener and can share what I’ve experienced. If you ever feel like talking or discussing anything I’m always available. dlandry57@centurytel.net. You can also find me on ELM as Dee.
I’m one of those “God please deliver me from your followers” type. I’m not going to go on and on about the hypocrisy and judgementalism (is that even a word?) that abounds in most churches, and the fact that most of the wars in our worlds history were fought over religion, or ..okay I am going on..My reason to post was to say I too feel the way you do but I did finally find a church that fed me spiritually ..it was a little church in Savannah, Georgia called the Unity Church …I’ve never felt in church the way I did when I was there..a feeling of peace, inclusion, and sense of purpose to make our world better. I’m not going to go into the specifics but it is a “church” that takes from all religions and finds the common threads to join us. When I had to move from Savannah to rural WV I knew I’d never find another church like it and I was right there are more churches per capita in my hometown and all of them are practically identical..(there is another Unity Church here but it’s not exactly close to us..) but I do still follow online where they have meditations and sermons to download and listen to. Just thought I’d mention it because I felt the way you did until I just happened that “church” for me down in Savannah.
Lori, you’ve been in my prayers for a long time now and will continue to be in them. My prayer is that you will fall in love with Jesus (not in a romantic sense, of course) but that you will come to know Him as the One who loves you more than anyone on this earth, the One who wants to have a close relationship with you, the One who gave his life on the cross for you…for all of us.
The people on this earth that we have close relationships with are the ones we spend time with. To have a relationship with Jesus and God, we have to spend time with them by letting God “speak” to us through his words in the Bible and by talking to Him in prayer. Maybe try going for a walk to a pretty area around where you live. That’s my favorite time to pray while I’m out in nature that God created. Maybe try telling God that you don’t know how to pray and ask for His help. You can talk to Him like you would a friend and tell Him what’s on your heart. He already knows but when we pour our hearts out to Him and ask for His help, it makes a difference.
One last thought, someone described the church as a “hospital for sinners.” No one is perfect. If we were, then Jesus wouldn’t have had to come. But we all need Jesus. Don’t let judgmental people come between you and Jesus. It’s not worth it! They will answer to God for their judgmental nature. We need to concentrate on our own relationship with Him. It’s worth everything!
Lori, in case you’re wanting an easier version of the Bible, you can go to BibleGateway[dot]com and try easier versions of the Bible like the” New International Version” or the “New Century Version” that are much easier to understand. Here’s a passage you might be interested in looking up. If so, just type it in the “Passage Lookup” and then choose the “Version” and click on “Search the Bible.”
Passage Lookup: John 3:16
If you ever have a question about something in the Bible, feel free to email me anytime.
I may be repeating what everyone else is saying but you don’t have to get it. What you get for your faith and beliefs are probably 100% different from mine and everyone elses. Believe and worship how you see fit. When I pray by myself, I don’t bow my head, fold my hands …nope. I close my eyes and go to a place in my house that I am comfortable and I talk to God in my mind. I don’t do it out loud. That is how I am comfortable. And I don’t attend church. My husband and I wish we could find churches like they used to have, down a dusty Texas country road, wooden pews and a small community. We all sin and we all keep sinning, but I think, my thought, is that I am a good person and will do good things not because of God or anyone else but because it feels right to be good.
Find your own path with your beliefs etc…do NOT let others influence or force your choices, otherwise it’s all wrong. Go with your heart, eventually you’ll “get it”.
I understand how you feel 100 percent! When I first started going to church I just didn’t ” get it”. I asked God if my purpose was to really go to church and get to know him, through prayer and bible, why don’t i get it? I learned that I wasn’t supposed to get it. LOL. God is. Period. You don’t need to get that. Trying to understand him or decipher him like an algebraic equation will never work. What you have to KNOW, not “GET” is that you are a daughter of the most high GOD. Jesus is the King of Kings and you are daughter of a royal line. By grace, you are forgiven! There is nothing you can do to make God not love you, because guess what? You have sinned and HE still loves you, does not care!!!!!! When your kids are bad, you are upset, but do you stop loving them? NEVER! You love them, and God have mercy on anybody who touches them! Thats how God feels about you. He loves you, and God have mercy on anybody who tries to deter you from your purpose in this place and time! I ask that you ask God to help you with what you are feeling. In His Word he tells us “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.” He is promising you, I will make you feel better, i will help you destress. Just Please come so that you can get to know me and I can do what I have promised you. You are his daughter, talk to him how you would your dad, your mom, look at your kids as an example. how do they come up to you and talk to you? God Bless you Lori!