When I first started blogging, my goals were to make money, period. And I did. In no time, I was in the top 50 money making blogs along with some very well respected affiliate marketers. But then, I realized it was taking over my life. It was changing me, the competitiveness, the money, all of it and I hated myself for who I was becoming. So I switched gears and directed my focus towards mom blogging. It was the complete opposite and felt I had found my place. Then, out of nowhere, it becomes this shark infested sphere right before my eyes and I’m thinking to myself how it’s just like playing with the big dogs of the affiliate marketing world………….so.sad.
What’s even more sad, is seeing people who I fell in love with online, go to hell. People who made me laugh, people who I respected, people who I thought would always stay true to their words.
I am so sick of people stepping on their friends to reach high places, secretly plotting with other bloggers to take down or beat that person. I’m sick of all the hypocritical, back stabbing liars that I’ve been seeing more of lately. I’m sick of people contradicting themselves and stupidly thinking we don’t see behind it. YOU ARE THE IDIOT, not us!
YOU ARE NOT HER. BE YOURSELF AND QUIT TRYING TO BE HER! CREATE YOUR OWN FREAKIN’ IDEAS INSTEAD OF STEALING OTHERS.
I’m also finding it amusing that fairly new bloggers are defining themselves as experts too. Wow, you go from asking everyone around you how to do this, how to do that, blah blah blah and yet, you turn around and dish advice acting like you know it all, not even recognizing WHERE YOU LEARNED IT!!!!
You say you don’t want to be that kind of person and you say you’re gonna change, you say you’re gonna be a better blog but do you do it? Do you actually follow through and be the better person, the better blogger or are the reasons that motivate you come from jealousy of what others are, what they’ve accomplished, where they are going and where you are not?
If I sound pissed, I am. I am sick of all of it, and you make me want to quit! And if you think this is about you, then you’re probably right and maybe you outta change a few things.
You tell em Lori! I don’t know what happened or who this is directed at but it sounds pretty crappy and you’re right, this isn’t about climbing over each other – it’s about support. There’s room for us all and myself? I’m taking my blog back thank you very much.
darn it all…I mess up your form every time I comment!
Ouch, someone M-A-D!
Honestly, I know how you feel. Sometimes, especially this past week, the blogging world has done nothing but make me feel like I just don’t belong, I’m just not ruthless enough to be part of all this nonsense.
Wowza. I don’t know what happened, but I love a good rant!
I started blogging in 2004 for me and I will continue long after the Mommy Blogging trend dies. I thought for awhile I might try to be a more popular blogger but you are right the bs is to much to deal with.
Lori,
I have no clue what is going on with you but I SO SO enjoy reading you and living your fun life with you. Remember there are lots of us out there who are invested in your life because of WHO YOU ARE and when you are authentic and true to yourself, it shows! Get a good night’s sleep and hopefully things will look better tomorrow.
Yikes. I’ve been a bit out of the loop lately but I think I’m glad. Haven’t the foggiest idea who you are referring to, but I totally understand your point. You’re genuine and that’s what counts. You are successful and have a following because of it. Be yourself and be happy.
You make me giggle. One thing I’m not is fake. Word.
Okay Lori, you got me. I want to be you…well, the photography you :-) Your photos always take my breath away.
You really are upset, I’m really sorry you are feeling that hope. I miss your posts so please don’t give up.
.-= Laura´s last blog ..Money, Money … (not from Mamma Mia) =-.
Go get em’ Lori!! I totally agree with you and it is the one reason why I am not so out there. I am a great, fun lovin’ person but the drama makes me not put myself out there. I hope you don’t allow whoever this is to be a damper on the awesome blogger you are!
.-= Jennifer´s last blog ..Fibers.com | Review and Giveaway =-.
I don’t know what happened either, but no one blogger owns the blogosphere no matter how much they think they deserve it or are “the” experts on their chosen niche.
I would just do my best to be as good as I can at what I enjoy blogging about and not worry about being #1. Pride comes before the fall. Remember- when it comes to popularity- the popular flavor of today, may not be that tomorrow.
.-= Tracy @ Hall of Fame Moms´s last blog ..Our Roofers. =-.
I backed away from the mommy blogs a while ago because there was a lot of infighting and drama. Sadly, I just dropped my email subscription to yours because of this. Love your blog, don’t like surprise negativity in my inbox.
I hope you are able to situate yourself in a good place away from nonsense. It is easy once you begin, I promise. I hope to see more great things from you in the future.
.-= Tammigirl´s last blog ..I Got Nothin’ =-.
Well said. But Wow. I hope you never get mad at me. I’d cry :) ((HUGS))
WOW Lori, I am going to say “ditto” to what everyone else said. I do want to say that one of things I love about reading your blog is YOU. You are the real deal sweetie, the authentic person and do not ever let any situation or any person or group steal that from you. I love reading about your life, your family, your hopes and dreams. I love that you share that with the rest of us. I don’t blog because it’s time consuming and I have a lot going on too, but somehow, you find a way to make us crave the “cowboy” life just a bit.
You are a wonderful wife, mother and friend to so many. You are talented and loving and genuine..don’t ever give up any of that for a “blog.” You have taught me a lot so don’t let others steal your light!
Oh, and I’m with Cheryl, do NOT ever get mad at me, I couldn’t handle it either LOL
I agree.. I really wanted to be a professional blogger until I realized that it’s like high school online… so I closed up my site and went back to blogging on Blogger just about me and my family.. I don’t care for drama or people that create it.. it’s amazing what some people will do to get to the top. I don’t want to be a part of that, I applaud you for having the guts to point those people out, they know who they are!
KUDOS!
Lori you are an amazing person, blogger, mother and wife. Although we have never “met” I respect you and you are one of the bloggers I look up to. I’m sorry about whatever happened to make you feel that way! I hopethings work out!
Kas
per usual, i have no fucking clue what is going on. but i will tell you that reading this post made me fucking crack up. not laughing at you, just imagining you saying it and being all pissed off. i love you. lol
and in all honesty, i’m happy that you aren’t all about the money and are more about home, family, the things that are truly important.
.-= jennster´s last blog ..let’s talk about gifts! =-.
Great post! I can relate.
.-= Martha Payne´s last blog ..Sweeps Notice — Kodak Easyshare D830 Digital Frame @ Mommy Goggles =-.
Lori,
I’m not a blogger and I just wanted to tell you that I love to read your blogs. I read a ton of them and I can tell who the fake, out for the money bloggers are…let’s just say I don’t check them everyday or have them on my feed like yours! Please don’t give up just because of a bunch of “cheerleader”bloggers act like snotty high school brats! There are real people who like to read real blogs like yours! I’m from Ohio…where am I gonna find out about cowboy livin’ if I don’t have your blog? Please don’t quit…
I never knew how crazy the world of ‘pro blogging’ (is that what it’s called?) could get. I never do more than the occasional blog to keep my family and friends updated on life. I try not to read that blogs that scream at you for attention. I happened upon your blog one day through a give-away or something of that sort. I didn’t sign up for your newsletters because you were a “look at me” blogger, because you aren’t. I signed up because you were down to earth and I really admire your way of life and as such, was interested in reading about it. I think you are a top-notch blogger and I’ll be sad if you ever stop blogging. I appreciate this post and hope people respect your anger because if they are one of the people you are talking to they deserve the post! I’ve rambled enough. Vent on us any time you feel the need. Good luck and much love!
Hehe…I thought when I clicked on this it was going to be a parody of the Brokeback Mountain scene–the “why can’t I quit you” part. Something different entirely here. Nothing I know about, nor do I need to get involved in, but thought it might diffuse things a bit…
.-= Lori Z.´s last blog ..Happy Groundhog’s Day! =-.
Lori, you are amazing and I have learned a lot from you. I do nt know what exactly you are talking about but – do feel competition. When people email, tweet or call me I like to help them like you helped me. I love helping new bloggers and those small biz in the green niche because I get so excited, I do not want to lose that.
Even in my day job I feel competition or at mom playgropus. Just keep doing what you do, hey?
See you in Nashville!!
I am sorry things are so crazy for you. I just started reading your blog a few months ago. I also did not realize that blogging was a competition. I mean really why and what for? Obviously not much of a blogger but have been considering it but mine would be more general. Good luck!
Girl you know I love ya and this is one of the reasons why! Don’t let anyone walk all over you, do things like you want, stand up for yourself and claim what’s yours! Good luck!
Wow. You’re really angry. Is it really worth it to get so riled up by people you don’t care about? Just a thought. Who knew the blogging world was so competitive & undermining? Yikes!
There are always going to be some folks who just ruin the fun for others. You just have to do your best to not let it get to you and keep taking the high road. You have done an amazing job with your blogs and I know you have always been SO helpful to other bloggers (like me) in giving advice. Some may not appreciate it, but I guarantee you that the majority of us definitely appreciate your help, guidance, friendship, and support. Not to mention, you are just a heck of a nice person to start with and it comes shining thru in everything you do! {{{HUGS}}}
I LOVE LOVE LOVE a good rant! This was GOOD! Whew. I feel you, I feel you :)
.-= tanyetta´s last blog ..Diabetes Wellness Event with Free Blood Glucose Test**: =-.
In the past couple of months I learned about some post-BlogHer drama that escalated into true cruelty, and it shocked me. Call me naive,
…but I honestly believed that people had been raised with manners, with common courtesy, with a sense of decency. Then my eyes were opened to how horrible people can be, and it was so disheartening.
No one should try to be anyone else. What works for one blogger isn’t going to necessarily work for another one, even if the blog is copied exactly. Or the NAME OF THE BLOG, ahem-people-who-call-their-blogs-Table-for-Five-don’t-even-get-me-started.
If your name was dragged into something unpleasant, I’m sorry. Please don’t quit blogging, you are way too good at it!
lori – you are an amazing blogger, very smart woman, and beautiful writer. please don’t quit. just ignore all the background noise and keep on doing what you love online because you’ve got fans girlfriend. xoxo colleen
.-= ClassyMommy´s last blog ..An Evening at Disney with Hanes Day 2 =-.
Well I hope you dont quit! I just found you.
I kinda want to be a pro bloger and make some money. After reading your post though – maybe I dont?? =)
Darn it! I cant believe I screwed up that form! lol Sorry!
.-= Stephanie@The Blue Zoo´s last blog ..Me At Blissdom – And My Sister Too! =-.
Sorry, things have been busy this past week and I just saw this. I am so sorry that something happened. I hope you continue blogging, you have a wonderful writing style. You’re a wonderful person and I for one am glad you’re around.
.-= valmg´s last blog ..Guess What We Found In The UK In EPCOT? =-.
Hi. I just found you via a Chris Brogan tweet. To borrow a term from the younger generation, haters want you to quit! They will tell you that they are right and you are wrong and you will question yourself and your reality. Woman, get a good night’s sleep, listen to your instincts and most importantly don’t quit while you are angry.
Hope to read more from you!
I found you through a Chris Brigan post and although I haven’t read you before, I am subscribing now. I have no idea what happened but I like the authenticity I read in your response. I’m checking your site out now.
.-= Lisa Rosendahl´s last blog ..Checking Out a Widget =-.
If you have something to say to me, just say it.
Seriously, I like when you rant; you’re so honest and I appreciate that.
Sorry for whatever set you off or whatever it was that tipped the scales.
xo
You know how I feel about you and your blogging and YOU as a person xoxo
.-= Rachel´s last blog ..Valentine’s Day Breakfast Recipes =-.
I always love your refreshing honest attitude Lori :) Keep on being you, because you are awesome.
.-= Loretta´s last blog ..Giveaway: Precut Fall Themed Quilt Fabric Blocks =-.
Sometimes it’s such a cruel community. The truth is i have a hard time connecting with a lot of bloggers because I’m afraid if I confide in someone they are going to use it against me or turn on me. It’s hard to find people to trust.
I wanna quite all the time
.-= Louise´s last blog ..A Simple Way to Pamper Yourself, Simple Facial Wipes #giveaway =-.
To be brutally honest, though…I am rather tired of the passive aggressiveness on the internet. If you have a problem with someone stepping on another, why don’t you call them on their shit?
Because I think that addressing it like this just fuels rumor, speculation and adds more drama. And isn’t that just as polluting as the things you are sick of?
Because it won’t stop if you don’t you know? You can write posts and put them up all day and HOPE that the person will clue in but they probably won’t.
At the end of the day, no one can make you go or stay and while I have UTTER understanding and empathy for the feeling I bet your bottom dollar that there is way more good that comes to you from the internet than a group of fugly people. You just have to let the ick roll off and the sun will come back in.
:)
.-= Loralee´s last blog ..Just in case you wondered what hanging with me for the day would be like. (Hint: It apparently includes lots of bed head, cleavage, a sickeningly cute baby and freaking AMAZING photographs.) =-.
I’m SO saying “ditto” to Loralee’s response.
.-= Angie [A Whole Lot of Nothing]´s last blog ..I NEEDS MY CROUTONS — Flashback Saturday =-.
I know how you feel and that is why I pretty much keep to myself now. I talk to certain people but I have really reached out to other bloggers and making new friends. I realized some of the people I was hanging around was only bringing me down and I was being mean to others, and that someone I am not.
I am sick of the cruelty though, I am sick of people thinking they are better than others, and making fun of people.
I am also sick of MOM bloggers threatening other moms, for what?
HUGS Lori, your an amazing person. keep your head up.